That is a very good question. I was never interested in boxing, nor would I have ever considered taking this up myself and seriously pursuing it. That is one of the reasons why I suddenly felt drawn to it: it is completely out of my comfort zone. I needed to do something radical in my life in order to strengthen certain parts in myself that don’t come easily to me – standing up for myself, trusting myself and being fearless in the sense of going into situations with fear but not letting myself be determined by my emotion.
There is something nearly archaic in boxing. You can’t rely on anything or anybody else but yourself in the moment of fighting. And that is nearly exhilarating. I just started doing this, so I can’t even tell a whole lot about it yet, but one thing I know for sure already: the way I respond in boxing is how I am life. For example, I need to pay attention and protect myself so I don’t get hit, but I shouldn’t defend myself. If my body posture is not upright and I am trying to avoid what is coming at me, I have no power and I am vulnerable to the punch. Instead, staying in eye contact with my opponent, staying upright, no matter what is coming at me.
I am not doing this because I want some new form of exercise. I have taken this on because I have necessity. I want to live free from being defined by fear – fear that tells me who I am and what I can do.